When God places a call to discern priesthood upon a man or religious life upon a man or woman, often it can feel like a great burden. “I do not know the way. Lord, I want to discern your will in my life, but I don’t know how. Sometimes I am afraid to draw close to you because you may ask something of me that will come with a cost.”

Many different questions arise during discernment. The most common is, “Will I be happy?”

Underlying this is often the desire for marriage and family, which is a good and natural desire. This desire is not a sign that one is not called. Jesus calls some to celibacy for the sake of the kingdom of heaven, “Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some, because they were made so by others; some, because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Whoever can accept this ought to accept it.” (Mt. 19:12)

God has created every single person for intimacy and love. We cannot live without love. To be sure, celibacy is a great sacrifice— but it is not a renunciation of love. Remember, God is love. No one loves like him. Those God calls to priesthood and religious life he calls to a life of profound intimacy and fruitfulness.

The other questions that come up tend to revolve around some sense of inadequacy: “I’m not good enough, not holy enough, not equipped enough, not smart enough.” In other words, “I can’t do it."

Even though you might realize that the Church needs priests and the priesthood is a beautiful vocation, you may feel like God must be calling someone else-- and calling you elsewhere. Please, don't let the fear of inadequacy hold you back from God's call. Be not afraid! We were often told in seminary, “God does not call the equipped; he equips the called.”

For those discerning a vocation, I propose two actions.

First, pray. By prayer I do not mean to incessantly ask God what your vocation is. I mean draw close to Jesus. Focus on growing in your union with him. Read the Word of God and talk to him about what stirs in your heart. Share with him your joys and sorrows, hopes and fears. Receive the Eucharist regularly, the closest we get to Jesus on this side of heaven.

Second, talk to a priest. You could reach out to your parish priest or to me. Learn about their vocation story. What questions did they struggle with? How did God lead them? I took great comfort in realizing that God had led countless priests in history to happiness and holiness, so it clearly was possible!

Frodo’s life was upended when he was invited to take his place in the adventure unfolding around him. Through his “yes” his life was blessed, and he blessed others. He took the courageous step of setting out on the journey in faith. Sometimes God upends our life as well in the adventure of discipleship. Don’t be afraid of being too small or of not knowing the way. God is big, and he does know the way.